Is that what they call them? You know, after a limb has been amputated, it still feels like it's there? I don't know.
I'm having all kinds of sense memories, especially in my belly. Or maybe I'm just feeling the emptiness. I had a similar sense back in September, those little twinges and pulls as the embryos dig in.
I went to the market today and only got stuff for me and Stella. Basics, too, like paper goods, diet Coke, but nothing specifically for C. I am inconsiderate. I am self-centered right now. I am self centered.
I'm so tired of the up and down. And I"m torturing myself by going back to emails from a year ago when I was starting to feel positively pregnant, like a part of the mom club. I need to stop that.
I just can't seem to get it right. And I'm so tired of these stupid, weepy posts. I want to be happy, or at least functional.
I'm so tired.