It's a lot to process. Moving forward while looking backward. I think possibilities are opening up now, and that's pretty frightening. Wonderful, but scary as all hell. I'd cry too.Hugs from afar.
Oh sweetie... It's so much.. It's okay. Just let it out. I cry every day. It makes it better sometimes, sometimes not. Don't hold it in. Just let it go. Sending hugs.
Maybe there's a little bit of relief in there? You've been under such a strain for so long - and beating yourself up every single day takes an extraordinary amount of emotional and physical energy. And now you know the light at the end of your tunnel isn't a train! But it's gonna take a bit more time for you to truly believe that. I felt the same after all the medical tests came back from my miscarriage. I'd felt so bleak and broken and hopeless - finding out that it wasn't my fault was just overwhelming. I was numb, felt like the breath had been knocked out of me, and all I could do was cry. A lot. It was like a cosmic apology.....and thank God for your new doctor. If you want crystal balls, you can dig up Miss Cleo. From an MD, you expect (and deserve) answers. Sounds like you finally have them. Take a few deep breaths, and hang in there. Thinking of you.....
i drove through your town the other day on my way to a bike race. thought about you a lot, especially when driving past the hospital. it would be good to see you again, when you're ready for company. --c.
I hate crying. But, I confess, sometimes I want to cry too. And not only for myself, but for all those, like you, whose stories have touched my heart.
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