Monday, August 18, 2008

What is it...

about fertile women that makes it safe for them announce their pregnancy before the pee stick is dry? It's that they're fertile, I guess.

I just read on faceb.ook that my cousin's wife is pregnant with #3 and due in May. "has a bun in the oven" is what her status read. She also announced at about 3 weeks pregnant with #1 (6 or 8 weeks after the wedding). For #2, I didn't hear about the pregnancy until she after she delivered him at full term, 25 months after #1.

She has never had anything but healthy pregnancies, and from what I can see, no trouble getting pregnant in the first place. That's what makes it safe.

And she's really nice. (Except for our little exchange right around her 5th wedding anniversary in July, which basically ended when she said, "I can't believe it's been 5 years (and 2 kids) either!" I just didn't really have a response to that. We had just had our 6th wedding anniversary in May).

I think what pisses me off most about this is that it pisses me off.

9 comments:

G said...

FB is doing this to me too. One girl has 4 kids already, in the time I have been trying to have 1... It makes me sad/jealous/angry/sad again. But I am still clicking over to FB too often.

Crazy.

CLC said...

I totally get this. I hate myself for feeling so envious of those with the problem free pregnancies and healthy babies. And that makes me more pissed that I feel that way. Just know that you are not alone in these thoughts STE. I think we are stuck with them.

P.S. Am I the only one on earth not on FB? What am I missing here?

c. said...

(CLC: You're not missing anything!)

I've never understood this about pregnant women either, although I have a more pronounced distaste for it now. The thing is I used to be that woman, your cousin's wife. I didn't announce my pregnancies that early, but I always knew how they were going to end. Until they didn't.

It pisses me off too, STE. I know it shouldn't. I know I should be bigger than that. I know. I know. I know. But it does. And I'm not.

Tash said...

I'm not on Facebook! And I'm not gonna be! Hahahahahaha!

I've never got women like that, ever. Sometimes it helps me to think that maybe they're the abnormal ones.

Ya Chun said...

My husband's cousin did that 7 weeks ago. You would think they would be more scared after what happened to us. Maybe they don't know the whole story, because no one in his family actually talks directly to each other, it's all through the grapevine.

I like to think it is their way of reaching out for support.

We didn't tell anyone until after our first Dr. appt, and we asked her when it was safe to tell people. She said it was fine, because we had seen the heartbeat by ultrasound. We slowly started telling very close people. Not announcing on FaceBook. I sent a big email to friends at 24 weeks, a big pic for christmas.

Now, if we are so lucky, I will tell some people early on for support, but no big announcements. Not until that baby is home.

I'm sorry it bothers you, and I think it is justifiable, understandable, and, yes, difficult to deal with.

loribeth said...

Not on Facebook either. ; ) I've never understood people announcing pregnancies immediately either. Whatever happened to waiting until the first trimester was over??

luna said...

stings like a mofo, I know. can't tell you how many times I ended up in a pile on the floor after some other announcement. the 2nds and 3rds during our time ttc hurt the worst. no magic words to make any of this go away...

theviewfromthisplace said...

"I think what pisses me off most about this is that it pisses me off."...i love this. i feel the same EXACT way. sometimes i don't even know what pisses me off...but i'm still PISSED OFF!!!

Natalie said...

A couple months ago an old friend from highschool announced on FB that she was pregnant with #3. Yeah, hurt like a mofo. Everything just crashing down. So freaking unfair. They sound so carefree when they do it, too. Just a little smiley face. Like they were saying they got an extra nice sandwich at lunch today. It's so foreign to me, so completely foreign.

I did announce at 4 weeks when I was pregnant, but it was because I had gone through hell to GET pregnant. I was freakin' esctatic. Scared didn't even enter my head, because I had never been pregnant before and that alone seemed like a victory. I don't think I'll do it the same again. Not after a loss.