Friday, March 4, 2011


My dear, wonderful and giving husband has given me the cold/bug he had last week.  It's years since I've had a cold -- or at least a bug lasting more than a day or so, but this is the end of day two and does not appear to be leaving any time soon.  I used to say that my work in a day care center and middle school gave me a rock solid immune system, but this time, it seems to be gravel. And, boy, am I whiny.

So, the work I wanted to do, the writing I needed to do, the grading I promised to do has not been done.

I worry about the writing because my progress this semester has not been what it should.  Of course, if I come back with something brilliant at the end of spring break (starts Monday) maybe I'll be given some leeway. Let's hope.

I called and left a definitive message on therapist's voicemail.  Thanks and goodbye.  Dr. Shrink has called a couple times to let me know he's waiting for call-backs from some local OBs and women's health professionals.  Unfortunately, the first name he came up with is a rec from my RE, an MSW who has been helpful with some of his clients.

The MSW degree doesn't really bother me, although there is weirdness re-creating the connection with the RE and I wonder about experience. I also wonder about the complexity (or lack thereof) of my issues, and where the focus needs to be.  Do I go for the IF specialist who is experienced with IF and general depression?  Or a psychologist versed in depression and experienced in treating women with IF?

It seems to tied together I can't seem to parse out what's going to be most critical to getting me healthy and functional.

I'm also concerned about my diss proposal.  I think I'm going to go back and focus on the questions I was asking a couple years ago for that project I did for class.  I need to really think about it and lay it out.  I think I would be able to do it with relative energy and depth if I can just get started, get past the sneezing and whining.

Lovely thing about being sick is that it reminds me of being depressed:  no energy, weird appetite, foggy brain, poor concentration. Hard to tell if the meds are working, with the cold, but I'm ready to be done with this. All of it. I have some thoughts about therapy and treatment, but I think I've reached my capacity for sentence formation.

Thanks again for all your comments and support.


AnxiousMummyto3 said...

I am so sorry you are not feeling well, and I hope you are able to find a good doctor to help you soon. Take care

Sara said...

Ugh, not what you needed right now! I hope it passes quickly. Rest and snuggle with the furry ones. I'm sure they're willing to lounge for the weekend.